Ms Naughty Porn for Women Blog

I remember when I stopped reading Cosmopolitan in my first year of university. It was one of the best things I ever did. The endless fashion, diets and super-skinny models always left me feeling bad about myself so I decided that it would be best if I just disengaged from that aspect of “women’s culture.”

It’s 20 years on and Cosmo hasn’t changed. Still, it’s a hugely popular magazine that many women do enjoy and when they come up with a sex survey, I can’t help but be a little curious. If you can get past the very first question which reveals that absolutely none of the respondents identified as gay, there’s some interesting titbits in there.

Naturally I leapt on this statistic:

Have you ever watched porn?
37% said yes, I love it
23% said yes, but only with a boyfriend
15% said yes, once – but I didn’t like it
14% said no, but I’d be open to it
8% said no, I hate the idea.
3% said no, because it’s exploitative

That’s statistically larger than a lot of other surveys suggest. The average figure seems to be 30% (a la Nielsen Netratings) but UK Cosmo women are keener on their porn – whether enjoying it by themselves or using it as a tool within their sexual relationship. That’s 60% right there. Add the other 14% who didn’t have a problem with the idea and you’re pretty much saying that 75% of Cosmo readers are OK with porn. Quite the impressive statistic.

Also, I think I’ll gloat a bit that not a lot of Cosmo chicks are into Dworkinesque anti-porn feminism – a measly 3%. Seems the Stop Porn Coalition have a long way to go to win over your average woman into their “all porn is bad” campaign.

OK, so this was an online self-selected survey done by a commercial women’s magazine. The page doesn’t say exactly how many women did the survey (beyond “thousands”) or what the demographics were, so it’s not the most scientific bit of research out there. Nonetheless, if we consider the sheer numbers of women who do read Cosmopolitan, it certainly suggests that more and more women are openly enjoying porn.

Just to give an idea of some of the other trends, based on what was most popular:
Your average Cosmo woman has sex 2-3 times a week in the missionary position, doesn’t have an orgasm as often as she would like and rarely has an orgasm from penetrative sex alone (oral sex or manual stimulation is better). She will still fake orgasms occasionally, will rarely have sex on the first date and prefers men who make her laugh.

I used to be a librarian. Some people are surprised that I then became a pornographer but a newly released survey shows that librarians are actually very sexy people.

Way back in 1992, Will Manley conducted a survey of over 5000 librarians, asking a slew of very personal questions about sex. The Wilson Library Bulletin refused to run it so now, after all this time, he’s posted the results on the internet. YAY!

The survey found that 20% of librarians had actually had sex in a library and that 61% had rented an X-rated movie. 91% had read The Joy of Sex. 20% thought sex without love equated to bad sex. What’s really fun, however, are the tongue-in-cheek questions:

Question 13 – Shakespeare and “the 1st Time”
When asked to pick the Shakespearean title that best described their first sexual encounter, 28% chose Comedy of Errors; 23% chose Midsummer’s Night Dream; 22% chose Much Ado About Nothing; 21% chose All’s Well That Ends Well; and 6% chose Rape of Lucrece.

Question 14 – Genre Fiction and Sex Lives
38% of the respondents classified their sex life as a “romance”; 31% as a fantasy; 22% as a comedy, and 9% as a tragedy.

It’s a great read. It tends to confirm my experiences of other librarians – I’ve found them to be open-minded and less conservative when it comes to sexual issues and they often have a wicked sense of humour. I’d love to see the survey repeated with 2010 librarians.

Women are watching more porn than ever. At least, that’s the conclusion if you read The Sun’s latest survey (and I will admit, The Sun must be taken far less seriously than other newspapers).

Around 76 per cent of women now admit* to using porn – a ten per cent rise on the two-thirds of girls who admitted to watching porn with their partners in a survey last year.

The most popular format is online porn, which is watched by 61 per cent of couples. Just one couple in 20 looks at magazines, while 18 per cent get their kicks watching porn DVDs on the telly.

The survey of 4,200 women also revealed four in five women like to dress up for their other halves and indulge in role play.

The most popular outfit is a French maid, used by 42 per cent, followed by nurses, chosen by a quarter of women.

The survey was actually by a site called Netmums which gives you an idea of the demographics. Apparently women have a lot less time and energy for sex at the moment but they’re putting more effort into it when they get the chance.

* I hate how newspaper use the word “admit” like porn use is a crime. It casts the whole thing into a negative light. Thankfully the article includes interviews with (and photos of) three typical porn-loving women. This is a really positive thing to include because it shows that women who like a bit of porn are just everyday, normal chicks who want to enjoy their sex lives using whatever tools are available to them.

The Sun is practically exploding with excited bold print in this article (and I use the term loosely) about a survey into porn viewing habits.

They’ve found that 66% of women watch porn. Well, duh. This is compared to 88% of men, out of a survey of 1000 Sun readers. I must admit, the 66% figure is a lot higher than all the other surveys I’ve seen on this topic, but maybe it makes a difference that readers chose to fill in the survey and that they are in the demographic of “people who actually read The Sun newspaper.”

The age demographics suggest that younger women are more likely to enjoy porn, but not that much more than women aged 26 and older.

65% of women said they’d watched porn with their partner or husband with a third of those saying they used it for foreplay.

Just spreading the word about two academic researchers that need porn-loving women to fill out their surveys.

Firstly, a Women’s Studies MA student called Hayley is asking feminists for their views on porn. Here’s you chance to kick Andrea Dworkin in the butt again, girls. Tell her what you think here.

Secondly, PhD candidate Susana Mayer needs to know about the sexuality of post-menopausal women – especially those who like porn. If you’re over the hot flushes, click here to help her out.

It’s worth taking the time to help research into women and porn. For so long we’ve been hearing the “women aren’t visual” schtick. It’s nice to get some real science and research on our side!

So a survey has revealed that 46% of women would rather give up sex than their internet connection.

The U.S. survey, which queried 2,119 adults last month, found that the gap grew even wider for both men and woman who were 18 to 34 years old. For woman, the percentage of those willing to skip the sheets in favor of the Web rose to 49 percent, while it climbed to 39 percent for men.

And for women 35 to 44 years old, the figure jumped to 52 percent.

Count me in. Although I’m not sure if I should be part of this analysis, considering the internet IS sex for me. And it’s work too.

But really. Unless I’m on holiday and deliberately disconnected, I miss the internet terribly when I don’t have it handy. And I use it all the time, to work, to write, to look up recipes, the weather, what’s on TV… Whereas sex… it’s only an occasional thing. And there’s no way to Twitter.

Just wanted to add a further post about the recent survey of the sex lives of Australian women (previous post here)

News.com.au has an article unfortunately titled “The sad sexual secrets of women” which is rather misleading since the survey has plenty of positive aspects to it, including an increase in masturbation, a desire for more consideration from male partners and a general urge to explore one’s sexuality.

I wanted to quote this part of the article, which hearkens back to the various discussions about “why women hate porn”.

But, overwhelmingly, we’re bored in the bedroom, causing many of us to stray in search of sexual thrills – which might explain why more of us are watching pornography to spice up our sex lives.

One respondent was so disappointed with the quality of porn movies available, she starred in her own.

“A lot of women described how porn is OK, but they would like it a lot better if it was made by women for women and then they would like to look at it with their partners and use it as a stimulant,” Sauers said.

On the downside porn, while titillating, had added “a whole new level of anxiety, not just about the body but about performance”, Sauers said.

She said that, while porn does carry risks because a small percentage of men become addicted, “to dismiss porn out of hand as an enemy of sexuality and an enemy of relationships is a mistake”.

I found it refreshing to read a relatively pro-porn comment like that in a News Ltd media outlet.

The aforementioned sad aspect of women’s sex lives is that one in three women have experienced some form of sexual assault.

Another day, another book, another news item and survey that says that women like porn.

A book called The Sex Lives of Australian Women says that 1 in 4 Aussie chicks will look at porn at least once a month. The book is based on a survey of 2000 self-selected internet participants.

Naturally, I’m not surprised at this 1-in-4 statistic, which seems to be the similar to the 27-30% figure that pops up regularly in most research.

One in five have also had a go at making their own sex tape, according to the report here. I liked this quote:

“It was fine, but to tell you the truth … watching it again was hilarious … not erotic … my arse was NOT ever meant to be on a tape,” responded a 33-year-old mother from Western Australia.

The Courier Mail article is also rather stunned that more women have orgasms via masturbation than any other method. This piece of information is always treated as if it’s an affront to men, somehow, and I’m a bit sick of that attitude. Of course you’re going to orgasm easily when masturbating! That’s the whole point. It’s a purely selfish activity aimed at creating an orgasm. Sex with a partner has a lot of other things going on, not least of which is the ongoing misconception that the penis should create an orgasm by moving in and out of the relatively non-sensitive vagina!

OK, just had to get that off my chest.

Meanwhile, in other unrelated statistical news, I’ve just realised I’ve now passed 700 posts on the Wordpress version of this blog (not counting the old blog). I installed WP in January 2006 so it’s taken me 2 and a half years to reach this point. Hurrah.

I’m still not sure if I should move the blog to a new domain. One of my tweaks seems to have worked with Google, a bit. I have a couple of other things planned to see if it helps.

The Porn Report seems to be making waves at the moment, with most newspapers giving the story a relatively positive spin. The Courier Mail, for example, gives Alan McKee plenty of column space here, with only lip service paid to the conservatives who argue against porn, albeit without any proof, by the sounds of it. I think that’s the cool thing about this book – it offers good, well researched statistics that can be used to counter all the usual hysterical arguments against porn.

The Australian has an excerpt from the book here.

The authors have also set up a site for the book, including a blog by Kath Albury that is already making for great reading. I’m going to include it in my blogroll because I think Kath has a lot of really worthwhile and intelligent things to say on the topic.

I’m a bit late with this but it’s worth blogging about anyway. Three Australian researchers have released The Porn Report, the result of several years of research and surveys. The finding that the media have jumped on is that – gasp! – women like porn.

17% of those interviewed for the book were women and the authors say that women make up an increasing percentage of the porn market.

That newcomer, says author Catharine Lumby, is likely to be a woman aged under 35 who lives in the suburbs, votes for a progressive party like the Greens, is in a monogamous relationship with a man and earns slightly more than average.

Lumby says research indicates that women who consume pornography favour watching DVDs on a laptop in the privacy of their home and also like to watch porn with a partner.

I actually participated in that survey and I’m pleased to see the book is finally out. I hope their findings are useful in reducing the stigma surrounding porn in this country and that it can be used to remove the ridiculous censorship laws in place here.

There’s a blog post and numerous comments on the topic here.

Most porn films these days (and I’m not talking about the frightening XXX types which are just wrong) seem to make the women’s needs as important as the man’s. (NB men). There is a big difference between the hardcore porn that could only possibly do things for dirty, disgusting pervs, but more the soft porn variety, which is not as, um, intrusive.

That’s probably one of the reasons more women are embracing it these days. It’s about having the choice and realising that porn comes in lots of different forms, from movies, to books, to even the naughty text message.

Nice to see a positive comment on porn in a News Ltd publication.

NY Time Out’s Sex Issue has heaps of great reading, including Audacia Ray’s personal discovery of double penetration and a whacky article entitled I Want To Have Sex With My Bicycle.

There’s also an online photo survey about what women find sexy. In the interests of science I decided to write down the statistics, unscientific though they are. It’s interesting that I could guess the answers in most cases, although some of the photos were obscure and probably screwed up the answers a little.

Shaving Style
Stubble = 73%
Clean-shaven = 27%
Total votes: 1847

Body Type
Beefy male model with pecs and six pack = 61%
Thin guy in amateur-type pic wearing coral necklace = 39%
Total votes: 1556

Tattoo
Small monochrome tatt of stylised lion on a man’s shoulder = 74%
Full enchalada tatt in multiple colors such as you’d find on a Hell’s Angel = 26%
Total votes: 1428

Penis
Uncircumcised = 57%
Circumcised = 43%
Total votes: 1959

Hands
B&W pic of hands in loose fists = 57%
Color pic of white man’s hands pressed together and splayed = 43%
Total votes 1959

Underwear
Boxer briefs = 85%
Y fronts = 15%
Total votes: 1282

Manscaping
Hairless = 75%
Hairy, as in the Burt Reynolds centerfold from 1972 = 25%
Total votes: 1279

Butt
White guy in white jeans = 74%
Black guy in lycra football pants = 26%
Total votes: 1211

Blue Collar Fantasy
Hot pool guy and blonde bimbo = 81%
Mechanic and blonde bimbo = 19%
Total votes: 1192

Sex Aid
Whipped cream and strawberries = 73%
Obscure device with probe and wire = 27%
Total votes: 1358