Ms Naughty Porn for Women Blog

This great video details The Bechdel Test, which is a way of measuring how mainstream movies treat women. To pass the test, a movie has to:

(1) have at least two women in it, who (2) who talk to each other, about (3) something besides a man.

The test first appeared in 1985 in Alison Bechdel’s comic Dykes to Watch Out For.

This site has a growing list of films that do pass the test. Films from 2010 include: Toy Story 3, Sex and the City 2 and, perhaps surprisingly, The Karate Kid. What’s more interesting is applying the test to your favourite movies. It makes you realise that the male point of view has become so normalised that we’re often blind to the marginalisation of women in films. Worse still, this whole attitude seems to be entrenched in Hollywood and is actually taught in film schools.

The idea of applying the Bechdel Test to porn films seems almost ludicrous; porn films are usually about one or more women “discussing” a man, nice and hard. Still, it’s another useful way of revealing just how male-oriented most porn can be.

via Erika Lust.

Gorgeous cartoon from Stuff No One Told Me, via Erika Lust.

I think we need to make this point a little more often. Romance novels are often derisively called “porn for women” and, while this is inaccurate in a lot of ways, it does make a point about unrealistic fantasies. Both porn and romance/fairytales offer a fantasy version of the opposite sex and depict sex and relationships in a very unrealistic way.

Interestingly, there isn’t the same moral panic about girls reading teenage romance novels as there is about boys looking at porn. But maybe it’s something we need to talk about more.

Just speaking from personal experience, I used to love Sweet Dreams and similar girly romance books when I was 14 and it led to plenty of confusing experiences when I finally got boys to pay attention to me. I expected them to act a certain way and floundered when they didn’t. I wouldn’t say it was a major problem, really, but it meant I was somewhat deluded about how this whole “love” thing was supposed to work.

Thankfully, it all worked out OK for me in the end and I did marry my Prince Charming. I just had to get used to the fact that he farts.*

Still, it’s a question worth asking: do romance novels encourage girls to have a warped view of men? Of relationships? Of sex? And does it feed into the general world view that sells Men Are From Mars-type books? Does it encourage the Cosmo-style idea that men are mysterious creatures who are afraid of committment and must be seduced with feminine wiles?

Or is this another case of not giving young women enough credit? Are romance novels, like porn, just a bit of easy entertainment?

And since I’m asking questions, here’s one: why don’t boys (in general) read romance? Is it because, like porn for women, there are no books that actually dare to offer male-friendly stories that focus mainly on love and relationships?

It’s an intriguing idea, romance for men. I’m now wondering what it would look like. Excuse me while I go away and see if I can find anything like it on the net.

* As do I!

I want to say thanks to Violet Blue for working her butt off over the last couple of days, organising a new pro-porn group that she’s called Our Porn, Ourselves.

Violet was spurred into action by news of an anti-porn conference to be held in Boston by the Stop Porn Coalition, an organisation that calls itself feminist but in fact has hidden fundamentalist Christian roots. This “conference” is long on speakers who condemn porn but pretty short on alternative views or real science. They’re happily pushing the “porn addiction” paradigm which is, as I’ve previously said, bullshit.

Also this group were happy to make use of extreme hardcore images in their presentations without checking the age of viewers or obtaining 2257 records. Most of the images were taken from online sites without attribution. I recommend you read Violet’s article from 2008 for more information about this organisation.

I’m completely in support of Violet’s efforts to counteract the “Feminists Against Porn” (FAP) argument. Too much of it is based on dodgy science, hysteria and a real misunderstanding of sex and gender relations. Throw in a dash of religious fundamentalism and you have a dangerous ideology. And I think one of the worst effects of their Chicken Little crap is that this stuff gets in the way of real discussion about porn and what it means.

I call myself a feminist and I like porn. And yet I do have problems with a lot of the porn out there. I think we need to be talking about it and thinking about how to make porn better without it turning into a “them versus us” war. Unfortunately, the way this conference is framed, there’s no room for questioning the anti-porn line.

This new movement is a way for sex positive women to stand up and tell that world that not all feminists accept the Dworkinesque arguments pushed by these puritans. And I think it will also give us an opportunity to start a real dialogue about what we really want from porn.

So I’m standing behind Our Porn, Ourselves and For The Girls is sponsoring the film competition.

Please also check out Violet’s Facebook page for the movement (at least, until FB gets puritanical and takes it down).

You might also want to read a few of my previous posts about porn, feminism and “porn addiction”
Naomi Wolf talks porn… again
This load of guilt and shame brought to you by Dirty Girls Ministries

Here’s the little image I made for the campaign:

A couple of years ago I expressed disappointment that Naomi Wolf had come out and declared “modesty” in the form of religious veiling to be feminist. Before that I was sick of her endlessly recycled article on porn.

Now she’s touring Australia and is once again talking porn, this time in an interview in the Sydney Morning Herald. I waded in, begrudgingly and emerged with mixed feelings about what she had to say.

Put briefly, Naomi Wolf still thinks porn is bad, mmmkay. Her reason for this is that “it’s definitely affecting young women and men’s sexual development deeply, deeply, deeply.” She argues that seeing porn from an early age is changing the way young people have sex and that it is not encouraging women to embrace their sexuality properly. She bases this mainly on anecdotal evidence, tales of female students fronting up to doctor’s offices with anal fissures after a first date. She says: “Young women do compare themselves to pornography and they do have porn running in their heads when they’re in sexual situations. I’m not a prude, but I don’t think that’s good for their sexual confidence or confidence in their bodies.”

I’m conflicted about these kinds of statements because I do acknowledge the concern there. Mainstream porn can send a lot of negative messages about body image and sexuality and we need to be talking to young people about it.

What I’m uncertain about is whether all these frightening anecdotal stories of girls being fucked over by ignorant porn-loving guys are true on a large scale. Are young people really imitating what they see in porn? Have anal and facials really become de-rigeur? Or are today’s young people actually more sex-, tech- and porn-savvy than that? Where’s the actual research?

One of the things that’s never mentioned during these “teens look at porn!” panics is the idea that, alongside all that easy access to porn is a simultaneous easy access to information. Girls in my day (and Naomi’s) weren’t able to find porn within a few keystrokes but we also weren’t really able to easily find information about sex. Cosmo “101 positions” articles and Dolly sex advice columns were about the best we could do.

Now things are different. Your average teen can easily look up information on any aspect of sex (type “sex advice into Google”). There is a vast amount of sexual information available on the internet, including sites like Go Ask Alice and Scarleteen that are specifically focused on young people. Add to that the many feminist sites discussing porn and sexuality and even sites like Make Love Not Porn which seeks to counter misconceptions about sex and porn.

So while I’m happy to acknowledge that it’s a problem if teens are using porn as sex education, I’m wondering if they’re really the startled ingenues everyone assumes them to be.

And I guess the question is: if we are worried about how young people use porn, what’s the response? I’m all for education and communication, talking about sex and the way that sex is depicted in porn and in society as a whole. Naomi’s solution, unfortunately, is abstinence:

Research shows that pornography desensitises; if you consume it a lot, you need more or more extreme or more and more intense images in order to get the same sensations over time… The best thing we can do is try to persuade young women and men that it’s not good for their sex lives, it’s not good for their self-confidence, and they’ll have better sex if they choose not to let this stuff shape their sense of sexuality.

My question is: what research? Are we talking the same research done by those earnest Christians who are out to prove that porn is “addictive”? Because their philosophical position and Naomi’s end up in a similar place: Porn is bad, mmmkay. (See my previous post on Dirty Girls Ministries to see just how similar their arguments can get.)

Naomi was asked about where non-mainstream and queer porn fits in. Interestingly, she acknowledges that some porn can be liberating and self-affirming but then she quickly skirts around the issue, returning to her main argument that it is desensitising. It’s not surprising she brushes past the topic because I think it’s one of the great sticking points in her case.

There are plenty of people who are enjoying non-mainstream porn and discovering new aspects of their sexuality through erotic imagery and writing. Porn can revive relationships and help women to orgasm for the first time. It can showcase different sexualities, different body types, different techniques and different experiences and this can be very reassuring to see. Porn like the films of Tony Comstock can also affirm the beauty of the sex act and the way it expresses love and intimacy. I simply can’t accept that fact that porn is, in essence, a completely negative thing that will always impact badly on a person’s sexuality. This assertion is just not true.

It really keeps coming back to the idea that porn is this giant, heterogeneous thing, something that only ever shows hetero sex where the woman is submissive or abused. Sure, there’s far too much of that out there and we do need to be talking about it and discussing its merits or lack thereof. But to dismiss the whole idea of porn as automatically damaging is far too simplistic an argument.

On Saturday the 10th in Toronto, Good For Her announced the winners of the 2010 Feminist Porn Awards. They are:

Best Bi Movie – Fluid: Men Redefining Sexuality | Madison Young | Reel Queer Productions
Hottest Dyke Movie and Hottest Kink Movie| River Rock Women`s Prison | Kathryn Annelle | Triangle Films
Most Deliciously Diverse Cast | Dangerous Curves | Carlos Batts | HeartCore Films
Hottest Feature Film | The Band | Anna Brownfield | Hungry Films
Most Tantalizing Trans Film | Speakeasy | Courtney Trouble| Reel Queer Productions
Sexiest Short | Handcuffs | Erika Lust | Lust Films
TheSmutty Schoolteacher Award for Sex Education | Tristan Taorminos Expert Guide to Anal Pleasure for Men | Tristan Taormino | Vivid Ed and Smart Ass Productions
Best Direction | Des Jours Plus Belles Que La Nuit | Jennifer Lyon Bell & Murielle Scherre | Blue Artichoke Films + La Fille’ D’O
Sexiest Straight Movie | The Deviant | Nica Noelle | Sweet Sinner Video
Good Releasing Emerging Filmmaker Award | Tobi Hill-Meyer
Heartthrob of the Year | April Flores
The Boundary Breaker | Jiz Lee
The Visionary | Shine Louise Houston
The Trailblazer | Tristan Taormino
Hottest Website: Rubysdiary.com

Honorary mentions
Dirty Diaries: 12 Shorts of Feminist Porn
Women Love Porn
Sensual Massage for Pregnancy
Cocksucker

Congratulations to all the winners. You’ll find more info about them and their films on the GFH website.

For The Girls was nominated for Best Website but I’m not really surprised we didn’t win. Maybe when this bastard of a new member’s area is done and we are finally able to forge ahead with all our plans for new content… next year we’ll get the gong. And even then if we don’t, not to worry. To me, seven years of amazing success and happy members is reward enough.

Edit 13th April: Here’s a couple of news stories:
The New Pornographers – Torontoist
San Francisco’s 2010 FPA Winners – The Examiner
Beyond that, there wasn’t much press coverage.

You may have noticed that my blog was kinda dead for a week. That’s because I’d tripped off to Melbourne to attend the Global Atheist Conference.

I wasn’t going to write about it on this blog. After all, it should be about porn, right? And I don’t want to alienate any of my readers who may be religious in their own way. But I feel the need to have a bit of a ramble about myself and what I experienced at the convention because it touches on the two things that define this blog: feminism and porn.

As a teenager I was a Christian but we never went to church. My family were very liberal in their beliefs and we didn’t go in for all the hymn-singing and praying stuff. As the years went by I whittled down my idea of religion into a fairly nebulous blob of “spirituality”. I thought that I’d probably go to heaven when I died because I was nice and surely God would see that. Beyond that, I didn’t think about it much. I’d read my bible, knew a lot of it was horribly violent and nonsensical but figured I liked the philosophy of Jesus. He was a good guy, like Ghandi. Still, I had serious problems with his followers and their idea of morality, particularly sexual morality.

It all changed when I read the God Delusion last year. I couldn’t fault the argument of Richard Dawkins against the existence of God/gods. I realised that I was actually an atheist but I hadn’t really examined my beliefs properly up until that point. It was confronting to realise that yes, I was going to die and that would be the end of me. At the same time, that realisation is rather freeing. I’ve got one life, I need to make the best of it. When I die, my non-existence will be exactly the same as it was before I was born.

SO… what’s this got to do with porn and feminism?

Fact is, religion is a major factor in the way we approach sex and gender. Unfortunately, the impact of religion on sexuality has been largely negative. The Christian/Jewish/Muslim view of sex as being sinful and dirty informs how we construct our own sexuality; it shapes what we find to be sexy. The idea of women as either Madonnas or whores is reflected in porn’s treatment of women.

You see the results in the very language of porn: how women are sluts and whores, how porn titles often use the words sinful, secret, dirty, filthy. I’ve seen people say that sex is best when it’s dirty. There’s so much guilt and shame surrounding the act that we rope in these emotions and fetishize them. The result is sexual expression that is often problematic, sexist, unrealistic and demeaning.

On top of that, so much of the opposition to porn comes from religious people and is informed by a religious morality that dictates a very narrow view of sexuality: that monogomy is the only acceptable form of relationship; that homosexuality is wrong; that “promiscuity” is sinful; that certain sex acts such as anal sex are evil; that masturbation is harmful. The push to label all porn as “addictive” has its roots in the desire of some religious people to control the sex lives of others.

Similarly, I find that the lives of women the world over are negatively affected by religion. All the monotheistic religions, Hinduism and even some strands of Buddhism teach that women are inferior. The entire basis of Islam seems to rest on the idea that men cannot control their sexual desires but it is women who are responsible for the sexual behaviour of men. Across the world oppression, violence and rape are regularly perpetrated against women in the name of God.

One of the best things about the atheist convention was that it was openly feminist. There was no animosity towards the concept of feminism whatsoever. The equality of men and women was accepted as self evident by everyone there. It occurred to me that I’ve rarely felt so comfortable with expressing feminist ideas. There was no animosity, no nervousness from the guys, no hesitant expressions of “I’m not a feminist but…” It was all relaxed and intelligent. Imagine how far we could get if all discourses on feminism were like that?

One of the highlights for me was the speech by Bangladeshi author and feminist Taslima Nasrin who is currently in exile from her home country and under the threat of several fatwas from Islamic fundamentalists. She was forced out of India in 2007 because she dared to write an article criticizing the burka and the way women are treated by Islam. She said: “Religion is made for the pleasure and comfort of men. I don’t know why any woman would subscribe to it.” For her, there is no compromise between Islam and feminism. She believes that a woman who wears the veil cannot call herself a feminist because she hasn’t properly analysed the religion that seeks to oppress her. This is from a woman who was brought up as a Muslim.

As she described the pain of living in exile and the constant fear of assassination, I blinked back tears. The audience gave her a standing ovation. Here is what feminism is really about, I thought. Here is a woman risking death in order to speak her mind, speaking out against women’s oppression.

And then I thought, I’m a feminist because I’m an atheist and I’m an atheist because I’m a feminist.

At the convention, we discussed a lot of things: philosophy, ethics, evolutionary biology, science and politics. While there was a huge diversity of opinion on show, one thing we all agreed on is the idea of a secular society. Church and state need to be separate. Political action should be based on evidence and reason, not personal belief.

Everyone has the right to their own religion (or lack thereof) but they should keep it to themselves. When we start telling each other how to behave according to religious beliefs, conflict and oppression are the inevitable result.

Every day I see examples of the way that religion is exerting too much influence on our society and causing harm. The bans on gay marriage, the growth of abstinence-based sex education in the US, the Catholic church’s sex abuse scandals, the Pope saying that condoms are not the answer to AIDS, the plan to censor the internet in Australia, the ongoing oppression of women in Saudi Arabia and Afghanistan and Iran, the widespread practice of female genital mutilation, the attacks on reproductive choice and the right to abortion for women, the tax-free status given to churches so they can prosletyse, the death threats against those who speak out against Islam. The murder of Dr Tiller. The whole Arab/Israeli conflict. 9/11… I could go on.

Because I oppose these things, I’m an atheist. And it’s part of my larger philosophy, one that includes feminism and what the psychologists stupidly call “erotophilia” – an enjoyment of sex without shame. I’m also a humanist; I believe in a secular society, freedom of speech and universal human rights.

I hope that there are religious people out there who also believe in these things and will stand up for them. In that we have lots of common ground.

I hope this post hasn’t put off any of my readers; I realise this is one of those issues that can be confronting and I certainly didn’t want to upset anyone with it. Rather, it’s simply a statement of where I’m at right now, and why I felt it important to attend that convention.

I think that the path to atheism is a very personal thing; you can’t really “convert” people to this way of thinking. They have to be ready to go there themselves. There’s no dazzling miracles on display, no mystical experiences to be had. Only the wonder of the physical universe and life on Earth and a sense of amazement at the improbable fact of your own existence.

Now, back to your regularly scheduled porn.

It’s now ten years since I bought my first domain name.

This means I’ve been creating erotica online for a whole decade – 2000 to 2010. When I started out I never imagined I’d be doing it for this long, nor that it would take me as far as it has.

In the last ten years I’ve seen the online adult industry evolve from single images on slow dial-up to a million free streaming movies. It’s gone from an initial startup phase, through a goldrush and into a major bust. It’s has moved from “tease” to full-on hardcore and seriously nasty stuff at every turn. It’s also seen numerous attempts to legislate it out of existence.

It all started for me in 1999 when I decided to write an article about online women’s porn. Conducting research, I went into the local library and started looking up porn sites on their internet terminal. You could get away with it back then. I found a whole bunch of gay sites and not much else – except for Purve.com, the first porn for women site.

I ended up chatting to the Australian woman who ran Purve and, after the article appeared in November 1999, she encouraged me to get into the business of adult webmastering. I set about learning the whole deal – what jpegs and gifs were, how to become an affiliate, how to make rudimentary websites. I went and bought Microsoft Front Page, despite howls of derision from my friends who all hand-coded. I didn’t care. It did the job.

The main aim was advertising. Put up a site with a few free photos, preferably small, under 20kb each and advertise paysites. Hopefully your average surfer would like what they saw and sign up for the good stuff. Back then, you could only get good quality pics and movies (occasionally) if you joined a paysite.

One of my first sites was Grandma Scrotum’s Sex Tips, originally hosted for free by a now defunct company (free hosting was the way to go in those days – bandwidth was really expensive. Unfortunately it made life difficult when the host went under and you had to keep moving your site all the time)

I also had a go at promoting mainstream porn for men but I wasn’t that interested. For me, porn for women was the main game. It presented a whole new “niche” that was being completely ignored by the “big guns” (still is).

I can still remember the day I got my first signup… and then my first cheque. The amount wasn’t huge but the thrill was substantial. I saw the potential to make some pocket money on the side while continuing to be a freelance journalist.

And then the signups kept rolling in, more each week. Suddenly it seemed I could make a living out of advertising porn. Which was cool. I tried selling books as well through Amazon but the commission of 5% could never match the 50-60% I could earn with smut. Especially since making sales was so easy.

I didn’t really tell many people what was going on. It was good for a laugh sometimes, seeing the surprised looks on their faces. Nobody expects me to be doing what I do, even today. They assume I’m some sort of serious, bookish type. Which I am, of course, with a mischievous, evil pornographer interior.

From 2000 to mid 2003 I continued to make sites advertising the five or six subscription sites that existed for straight women. (Playgirl wasn’t part of the equation; they were unable to use the Playgirl domain until 2006 thanks to a court ruling. Shady operators had used the domain for fraud. On top of that, the company seemed to dismiss the idea of the internet as a waste of time.)

I wasn’t alone in wanting to make porn for women. I was part of a small group of other female webmasters who wanted to market to females. Every day we’d chat about the subject on the Women’s Erotica Network message board, discussing what it was that women wanted to see and how best to appeal to chicks like us.

The rest of the adult webmastering sphere weren’t interested. We often had large online arguments where the guys happily pronounced: “women don’t buy porn, they’re not visual, selling to women is a waste of time.” Eventually we stopped arguing. Their loss.

The technology progressed, as did marketing techniques. In the beginning were webrings and picture posts. You could create a seriously ugly page and fill it with ads and make sales. Then came linklists, consisting of large collections of adult links, supported by advertising. Ms Naughty is one of those. The linklist rules about the structure of free sites became rather rigid, requiring a minimum number of photos and a restricted number of ads. Then we saw the emergence of Thumbnail Gallery Posts (TGPs), comprising of single pages of thumbnails rather than full sites.

More and more webmaster message boards sprang up. These became the primary place to network with others and advertise. The first online industry conventions occurred.

The main aim at that point was to get listed in Alta Vista. Number 1 on that search engine was a licence to print money. You’d also submit to Yahoo, Ask Jeeves and about 100 others. The results varied wildly from search engine to search engine. You’d also hope to get listed in the DMOZ Open Directory Project. I think it might have been 2002 when we started to prefer this “Google” thing that seemed to always give better results. I liked it straight away because my sites did better in Google than Alta Vista or Yahoo.

Then, in 2003, our little group of porn for women marketers began to go our own way. I had a disagreement with the owner of Purve, as did fellow webmistress Jane. In the aftermath we decided to set up our own adult site for women, modelling it on Australian Women’s Forum. In June 2003, For The Girls was launched.

Almost immediately we hit a snag: our credit card processor collapsed in the first month and made off with our initial profit. Thankfully we were better off than some who lost thousands. In 2003 American Express had decided to pull out of CC processing and Visa had introduced strict rules and a “danger fee” for adult sites. Not long after that Paypal announced it would not process for adult either and subsequently froze the accounts of many people, confiscating their “sinful” cash. We saved FTG by getting an account with CCBill and carrying on. Thankfully, CCBill is one of the few surviving third-party processors; at least 3 others went under in that year.

2004 saw blogs become popular in the mainstream. I launched the Ms Naughty blog that year in a very simple format; Wordpress wasn’t really an option at that time. I upgraded it to WP in 2006.

In 2004 the Bush administration, with the help of Attorney General John Ashcroft, introduced major changes to the 18 U.S.C. § 2257A law which ostensibly exists to prevent minors from appearing in porn (models must prove they are over 18). The new ruling changed the definition of “secondary producer” of adult content, making adult webmasters liable for any adult image that appeared on their site, even if they had nothing to do with originally creating that image.

The law imposed incredbily onerous compliance rules and allowed the government to essentially raid your house without notice or a warrant to “check your records.” I saw plenty of successful smaller webmasters driven out of the business by this new law, fearful of its implications. In 2005 it all went to court… and stayed there, it seems. A 2007 ruling said it was unconstitutional while another upheld it.

The 2257 thing was yet another attempt to restrict the spread of online porn. The 1998 Child Online Protection Act tried it and was struck down. The Communications Decency Act also had a go at it. There’s also been numerous prosecutions for obscenity, the most notable being John Stagliano in 2008. Nothing ever seems to stick.

Meanwhile, I just kept writing erotic fiction and searching out female-friendly pics and movies for For The Girls and my other sites. We held an annual fiction competition from 2005 to 2008 with much success.

Video On Demand sites had begun to be popular by about 2005, although AEBN had been offering their service since 2000. They began to challenge the old subscription-based paysite model in the second half of the decade.

In 2006 I remember going on to one of the adult webmaster boards and asking my peers: “What do you think of this Youtube thing? Should I embed this code on my page or will it break my site?” At the time I didn’t see that Youtube would become the future of porn. I don’t think many of us did. Yet it felt like only days before flash video was everywhere and porn tube sites sprung up like mushrooms, many offering full-length movies for free. Of course, it hasn’t ended well.

2007 and 2008 saw the Russians and the cheaters move into traditional webmastering in a big way, much to the frustration of the rest of us. A huge influx of new webmasters began catering to a dwindling number of surfers. Free porn was everywhere. The gold rush was over.

In the last two years I’ve seen an awful lot of old-timers sell up and leave the business, frustrated at constantly having to fight cheaters, liars, content thieves and scammers, seeing major companies beginning to rely on dodgy billing practices to keep themselves in profit. In the meantime the audience has come to expect that porn should always be free.

At the same time, I’ve seen the rise and rise of alternative, sex positive and feminist porn. In 2006 Good For Her started the Feminist Porn Awards and they’re due to have their fourth event in April. Early dyke porn pioneers CyberDyke have been joined by Shine Louise Houston and her Crash Pad films and site. Courtney Trouble’s No Fauxxx continues to cut across genre boundaries by offering all kinds of different erotica, gay, lesbian, straight and genderqueer. The original alt porn site Suicide Girls has had its share of trouble but other alt sites have stepped in to fill the gap. Meanwhile, the lovely Tasty Trixie has built her own adult empire, being in this business longer than me.

I’ve seen at least six porn for women paysites go out of business… which is always a pain in the arse because I have to take down ads. In 2010 there aren’t many subscription sites actively targeting straight women as their main audience; I’m proud to say that For The Girls is still going strong after nearly 7 years in the game.

Way back at the start of 2000 , when the new Milennium and the Sydney Olympics made everyone feel shiny and peaceful, I had no idea that I’d be sitting here in 2010, getting wrinkly and hunched and thick around the middle, still making a living from online porn. The internet has been very good to me; it’s provided an opportunity to become my own boss and to create a virtual magazine that publishes the quality work of many excellent writers. It has let me carve out a space where I can promote a healthy and positive version of erotica and given me a small voice for women amid a rising tide of sometimes horrible male-oriented porn.

And it’s let me do all this while wearing pyjama bottoms and daggy old t-shirts.

Will I still be doing this ten years from now? I don’t know. I can’t even think ten weeks ahead at this stage. But I don’t feel the urge to give up any time soon. I’ve still got about 20 domains waiting for me to develop them. And a feature film to make. And an internet filter to fight.

And who knows what kind of technology we’ll have in 2020? Perhaps all those promises of “virtual reality sex” will actually come true. Either that or the internet will have become so controlled and censored by world governments that online porn has become a distant memory.

I do know that we’re going to have to start re-negotiating the concept of paying for porn. The expectation that everything will be free is creating problems. As I wrote in this post, the audience can’t expect producers to keep making porn if it results in a loss. Especially if those producers are trying to break the mould and offer something positive and different. It will all grind to a halt eventually, and I don’t want to see that. I want to see change; it’s what I wanted from the moment I started in 2000. We need better, more positive porn and the way to make it happen is for the audience to get behind those people who are trying to create change.

It’s gonna be an interesting decade, I suspect.

Vice blog has some fascinatingg interviews with four of the main stars of the new wave of authentic lesbian porn – Dylan Ryan, Syd Blakovich, Madison Young and Jiz Lee. These women dish the dirt on what it’s really like to be a porn star, share anecdotes about bodily fluid mishaps and also give their views of feminist porn. Worth reading.

Here’s some quotes from Jiz Lee:

So you’re sincerely turned on when you’re working.
Yes, and I wouldn’t do it any other way. Being turned on and having a good time filming is one of the [major] reasons I do what I do. I also do it consciously knowing that I represent queer homo hapa faggy soft-butch dykes…

Even down to aesthetics like hair–I have hair, and I like the way it looks. Every now and then I’ll shave it ’cause I want to play, not because that’s the way beauty has to be. I’d say “Fuck The Man” but lots of straight dudes dig my work and my hairy asshole. I have words for them: All my pubes are my feelers, and the hair around my asshole is my wizard. And it is very, very wise. Some folks say that “disco bush” is back in style. Mine is “disco gutter.”

Women are watching more porn than ever. At least, that’s the conclusion if you read The Sun’s latest survey (and I will admit, The Sun must be taken far less seriously than other newspapers).

Around 76 per cent of women now admit* to using porn – a ten per cent rise on the two-thirds of girls who admitted to watching porn with their partners in a survey last year.

The most popular format is online porn, which is watched by 61 per cent of couples. Just one couple in 20 looks at magazines, while 18 per cent get their kicks watching porn DVDs on the telly.

The survey of 4,200 women also revealed four in five women like to dress up for their other halves and indulge in role play.

The most popular outfit is a French maid, used by 42 per cent, followed by nurses, chosen by a quarter of women.

The survey was actually by a site called Netmums which gives you an idea of the demographics. Apparently women have a lot less time and energy for sex at the moment but they’re putting more effort into it when they get the chance.

* I hate how newspaper use the word “admit” like porn use is a crime. It casts the whole thing into a negative light. Thankfully the article includes interviews with (and photos of) three typical porn-loving women. This is a really positive thing to include because it shows that women who like a bit of porn are just everyday, normal chicks who want to enjoy their sex lives using whatever tools are available to them.

This morning I read an opinion piece by Natasha Walter in The Times Online called How Teenage Access To Pornography Is Killing Intimacy In Sex. The headline is pure moral panic but I was surprised to find that this extensive article actually contained a real attempt to be vaguely balanced in its anti-porn argument. Normally these kinds of pieces are all hysteria and generalisations and Dworkin-style feminism. This one went close to that but then tried a bit harder. These paragraphs were what gave me pause:

Now that the classic feminist critique of pornography — that it necessarily involves or encourages abuse of women — has disappeared from view, there are few places that young people are likely to hear much criticism or even discussion about its effects.

Many women who would call themselves feminists have come to accept that they are growing up in a world where pornography is ubiquitous and will be part of almost everyone’s sexual experiences. I can see why some are arguing that the way forward really rests on creating more opportunities for women in pornography, yet I think it is worth looking at why some of us still feel such unease with the situation as it is now.

I do not believe that all pornography inevitably degrades women, and I do see that the classic feminist critique of pornography is too simplistic to embrace the great range of explicit sexual materials and people’s reactions to them. Yet let’s be honest. The overuse of pornography does threaten many erotic relationships, and this is a growing problem. What’s more, too much pornography does still rely on or promote the exploitation or abuse of women. Even if you can find porn for women and couples on the internet, nevertheless a vein of real contempt for women characterises so much pornography.

It’s very rare that writers actually acknowledge the existence of alternative porn such as the stuff I make. And I find that rather pleasing because it means they can’t get away with the “all porn is bad” or “all porn hurts women” nonsense. They also can’t then start arguing for censorship because they’re aware it would harm sex-positive erotic expression.

And the fact is that I too have major concerns about the ongoing misogyny and negative attitudes that pervade mainstream porn. I too wonder what it’s teaching young people and whether it’s reinforcing sexism or making guys into bad sexual partners.

My problem, though, is with the assumption that this is absolutely and definitely happening to a large number of men. And the reason I have a problem with it is because there is no scientific evidence to back up that claim. In the article Natasha writes:

For a long time I was sceptical about the claim that the internet had really changed people’s access and attitudes to pornography. Those who want it have surely always been able to find it, whether they were living in 5th-century Athens or the 1950s. But the evidence (my italics) has convinced me that the internet has driven a real change for many people, especially younger people.

She then goes on to quote statistics about how many teens and men are using porn but she fails to then offer any proof that the use of porn is then causing harm.

And that’s the real problem with these kinds of articles. The writer can come up with numerous individual anecdotes that back up their point (in this case, a lengthy interview with “Jim” who became obsessed with porn as a teen) but there’s no real, proper research offered to back up those individual cases.

I too find it disturbing when I hear of women saying their partners became crap in bed after they’d gotten a little too interested in mainstream porn… but can that be extrapolated into a wider trend within the male population?

Fact is, no huge studies have been done to prove it. And here’s the other problem: you’re gonna need a seriously massive study to see any kind of trend. Because the internet means that everybody looks at porn now and if you then think about whether this ubiquitous thing is having a visible, quantifiable effect on vast numbers of men… well, I just don’t see it. In theory we should be witnessing the wholesale destruction of relationships, increasing sexism in our everyday interactions, major psychological problems becoming commonplace among men but it’s just not there.

Instead you could point to the studies that show incidences of rape and sexual harrassment fell in the last ten years. Or even the recent very small survey in Canada that sought to answer these very questions. The researcher originally made headlines because he was unable to find any men who didn’t use porn for his control group. But he did discover that the men in his study watch porn with a cynical eye and that it doesn’t lead to criminal behaviour.

Thus, I don’t really buy into the argument that mainstream porn is making men into complete bastards even if it does make some kind of logical sense. And yet I do want to continue the discussion about what meanings mainstream porn IS constructing and what it means for teens who are, unfortunately, getting their sex education from porn. I’m all for talking about what’s wrong with the depictions of women and sex and advocating for a more positive portrayal of sexuality.

And I’m certainly keen on bringing men into the conversation and hearing what they think about it. Because too often articles like Natasha’s make generalisations about “what men think” without recourse to actually asking them. I actually like to hope that most guys do take porn with a grain of salt, aware that it often appeals to negative emotions or base impulses. And perhaps if we can get that discussion going, more men’s consciousness can be raised to the point that they’re aware of the problematic nature of mainstream porn.

Education and communication is the solution to this puzzle. It always is.

For another view on this, please read The Thin Line Between Pearl-Clutching And Concern at The Pursuit of Harpyness. A good dissection of the issue AND I just love the term “pearl clutching”.

Who cares about the stupid present? Give her tongue, man!

Here’s a nice dirty photo to spice up Christmas a little. You’ll find more at the free mini site Carnal Christmas.

I’m kind of bemused at some of the recent news articles that discuss the idea of women enjoying porn. Since the Oprah show they’ve been popping up here and there and they all seem to breathlessly report the “1 in 3 porn surfers is female” like it’s a brand new phenomenon.

It’s not.

I’m now approaching a decade of making porn sites and I’ve been catering to an eager female audience the whole time. And I wasn’t the first person to do this. Women have been seeking out decent porn for years now and even Nielsen Netratings acknowledged this with a “1 in 3″ statistic back in 2003. Hell, when my old employer Australian Women’s Forum launched in the early 1990s it was an old idea.

Perhaps the one difference is that it’s now considered more normal, perhaps because the internet generation have become adults. For them, porn is nothing to be ashamed of; it’s part of their everyday lives. And I’m talking about both males and females here.

Still, it’s nice to get see mainstream outlets acknowledging that women enjoy porn.

Here’s a couple of the pieces that prompted this small rant:
The exploding world of soft porn for women (exploding? Phew!)
Women Love Porn, Too!

It took five weeks but here, finally, is my little doco about the 2009 Berlin Porn Film Festival. It’s a little over 4 minutes and you’ll hear some great comments about feminist porn by some of the fab female directors I met including Shine Louise Houston, Anna Brownfield, Candida Royalle, Anna Span, Petra Joy, Jennifer Lyon Bell and Renee Pornero. Plus a quick cameo from Joe Gallant and footage from the Petra Joy Awards presentation.

A much longer version went live at For The Girls yesterday and I’ll also be uploading more footage there soon. Candida Royalle’s lecture about her films is particularly interesting – that’s waiting for a future update. I also wrote an expansive article about my experiences in Berlin for FTG.

The short blog version is that I had a ball, won an award, met lots of wonderful people and wished it could have gone for another 3 days. I didn’t get to enjoy nearly enough films because I was so busy with the Petra Joy Award but the ones I did see were amazing.

It was the people I met that really made it worthwhile. I interviewed Shine Louise Houston from the Crash Pad Series and was so impressed with her drive and knowledge. She’s a woman with a plan and she’s going to become even more of a force to be reckoned with in the future.

Well-known director Joe Gallant could well be the nicest man in the world. We talked the future of porn and hopefully we can work together at sometime next year. He said he thought I’d like Bong Water Butt Babes but I wasn’t so sure. He made me aware of how disconnected I am from the mainstream porn industry… something for which I’m kind of grateful.

Anna Brownfield is a card. We were so pleased to meet each other and had the comraderie of two Aussies lost in Europe, trying not to slip into slang when giving interviews. Her film The Band was such a standout and it shows you can easily marry explicit sex, comedy and great storytelling.

I also got to meet Lisa Vandever from Cinekink who is so much fun and easy to talk to, as is Vena Virago, a wild, pink haired artist who just happens to make porn for Vivid Alt. And I found myself getting stupidly protective towards the gorgeous Julie Simone, who is very quiet and shy, despite being a fearsome BDSM Mistress who can rock a rubber dress.

And then there’s Jennifer Lyon Bell of Blue Artichoke Films who I met last year. Jen is kind of like the social glue of the event, introducing people and arranging dinners and you couldn’t encounter a warmer, more positive person.

I even got to say hello to Candida Royalle, albeit briefly. Indeed, I cringe a little when I think about it. I was feeling a little starstruck and eagerly handed her my card which read Louise Lush. “That’s my new pretendy name,” I said.

Pretendy name??? Sheesh! I like to flatter myself that I have a decent vocabulary but do you think I could remember the word pseudonym for love or money at that moment? My husband has been teasing me about my pretendy name ever since.

OK, enough name dropping. Suffice to say I made lots of contacts and, as you see in the film, we all feel like we’ve found a family in Berlin.

I’ve since discovered quite a few of the short films on Youtube or other free sites around the web. I’m hoping to feature these on the blog in the future.

And as expensive as it is to travel all that way I think I’ll have to go back in 2010. The festival is too much fun and far too useful to miss out on.

Someone has helpfully posted the segment on the Oprah show featuring Violet Blue so I’ve finally been able to watch what was said.

Violet has posted her feelings about the show on her blog and they’re overwhelmingly positive. I like this bit:

Look closely at this show and you’ll notice that Oprah has reframed the entire conversation: we women are not ‘tolerated’ or marginalized for exploring our inhibitions, voicing our desires, or owning our sexual agency — we are embraced. The 1 in 3 consumers of adult material online — women — were finally acknowledged, and with respect for a change…

Myths and stereotypes: smashed! We live in a world where women are more sexually powerful and articulate than any other time in history because of the internet and emergent communicative technologies. Oprah’s hip to it. You’re soaking in it. And that’s really, outrageously exciting for all of us.

She’s right, of course. It’s wonderful that women’s erotica got such a good airing on a mainstream TV show without the usual negativity.

I do, however, have a gripe. I feel that the show only seemed to skim the surface of the topic and it did so in a way that seemed to focus much more on the mainstream porn industry rather than the burgeoning indie/women’s porn movement that I feel is doing a better job at catering to women. I think having the interview with Jenna Jameson as the main focus meant things were skewed that way.

That moment when Oprah first asked about Violet’s recommended movies had me holding my breath, waiting to hear Tony Comstock’s name, or Nica Noelle’s, or Shine Louise Houston’s or even Candida Royalle’s. Alas, it turned into a plug for Jenna’s relatively mainstream film The Masseuse, fab though that may be.

And it’s wonderful for Playgirl and director Skye Blue to get a mention but for me that company is a prime example of mainstream porn aiming at a female market but not necessarily getting it right. The Playgirl movies I’ve seen look great and can inspire a mood but they still feature the same old porn stars having the same old porny sex. They’re nice enough but they could be so much more.

Of course, maybe I’m just jealous. Actually, I AM jealous, dammit. Once again, online porn receives much less media attention than “real” porn offered via movies (although now that DVD sales have tanked, this may change).

The main thing is, it’s a start and it was good that Oprah even dared to tackle the topic (especially given some of the negative and vitriolic reactions from viewers in the forum).

Now that Oprah has announced a new cable lifestyle channel we can look forward to a sexuality-themed TV series, one that has more time to devote to women’s erotica.

I can dream, can’t I?