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Ms Naughty Stuff About This Blog Note: Links to the newest entries are located at the bottom of the page. Cunniling Linguists - toplist of witty sex blogs
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Ms Naughty's BlogThe new blog is here!The highs and lows of trying to install a new blogWell, today the Ms Naughty
blog is looking screwy, and I have no idea why this error has occurred.
I'm in the middle of fiddling with Wordpress so that I can upgrade
this blog, and something has gone wrong with the php. Yesterday
I felt on top of the world, because it seemed like I was starting
to overcome my code-nancyism. Today I'm stumped. I'll keep trying.
Update: Well, the script for this blog is so out of date it messed
with the php settings. So that's it, my poor old blog is now dead...
at least until I master Wordpress and get it happening here. So
sorry for the inconvenience, I'll be up and happening again shortly. ASDA supermarkets to sell vibrators"Men and women are far more relaxed about these types of products and tell us they would like to be able to purchase them in a more comfortable environment," says Helen Clayton, a marketing manager at ASDA. The stores will be selling vibrators made by Durex, as well as the vibrating rings first made available in October. The story gives rise to all sorts of amusing jokes about shopping lists. "Yes darl, we need a loaf of bread, a container of milk, a stick o' butter and a purple Little Gem vibrator..." Catherine Gort, group marketing manager for Durex, said: "It's a fact that more vibrators are sold at Christmas than washing machines or tumble dryers." You know, I'm really not surprised by this. Everyone knows that a washing machine doesn't work nearly as well as a Hitachi Magic Wand, and it's hell to fit in the bedside drawer. Posted: Thursday 15th December 2005, 9:33 PM Keith Urban regrets Playgirl shoot"I look back on it and I go, 'That probably wasn't a great idea.'" he said. Apparently music executives urged him to do the photoshoot as a good career move but Keith isn't so sure. "I look back now and wish I hadn't done it. There are some things in your career you wish you hadn't done, so there it is." Ah Keith mate, we don't regret that you did it. Indeed, the only things wrong with your pics are the haircut, and the scary black G string. Frankly, it looks a little girly. If you're curious about the pics, you'll find them at Urban Intensity. Posted: Tuesday 13th December 2005, 10:47 PM Searching for Superman's Bulge (the SuperGroin!)Fansite BrandonRouth.com didn't have many promo pics from the upcoming Superman film, but I did find this one:
A closer inspection of the pants area in question reveals this:
That's quite the unassuming bulge. Has the pic been doctored? I'm not sure. Perhaps the general sturdiness of the SuperPants fabric has flattened the wedding tackle into a much less interesting shape. As with everything about this new Superman movie, we must compare the package with the late great Christopher Reeve. The Christopher Reeve Home Page provided me with this great pic:
and the subsequent closeup of the 1979 Supergroin is revealing:
Gotta say, Christopher is winning the battle of the bulge in this case, although that clingy 1970s nylon fabric may have made all the difference. If there's been one improvement, at least Brandon's SuperUndies don't go all the way up to his armpits. What about Dean Cain, who played Superman in the TV show Lois and Clark? I found some good pics at The Superman Homepage (and I recommend you check out the galleries there for all your Superman Groin needs). Interestingly, Dean had a lot of promo photos taken at a slight angle, and most of those pics seem to suggest he dresses to the left. And then I found this pic:
which provided me with this rather revealing SuperGroin closeup:
Ka-ching! Now that's what I call Super Dick Definition! Posted: Tuesday 13th December 2005, 9:41 PM The new Superman's groin is too bigWell, they don't want it up on the big screen but I'm sure there are plenty of female fans out there who won't mind at all. And if they can erase his package digitally, surely this means that CGI effects teams also have the power to enhance the area? What male star would say no to that? Apparently wardrobe artistes had to create a special codpiece for Brandon. Nice work if you can get it. A similar "dick's too big" incident occured with Colin Farrell last year: Colin Farrell's penis and Colin Farrell's penis part 2 Posted: Tuesday 13th December 2005, 8:47 PM exexExChurch announces Church StakeoutIt's all a joke of course, but perhaps these religious loonies would think twice about trying to inflict their views on others if the same thing happened to them. Posted: Friday 9th December 2005, 7:57 PM Scarlet magazine off the shelves at TescoSpokespeople for Tesco said the decision was made because there wasn't enough space on their shelves. Scarlet's publisher Gavin Griffiths pointed out that several "lad's" magazines remain untouched. "If you look at titles like Nuts and Zoo, they are just pornography, and I don't understand why they are allowed on the shelves, but erotica for women isn't," he said. Scarlet is now over a year old and apparently selling 70,000 issues a month, although we're not sure what effect this decision will have on their circulation. They've still got shelf space at WH Smith's so all is not lost. The magazine recently received a write up in the Times, with columnist Jonathon Gornall discussing the concept of sex toy testing and suggesting that the ideal woman's vibrator would "rotate and gently vibrate while reciting whole chunks of Pride and Prejudice". Now, if I may go off on an aside here, I have to say that actually sounds like a damned good sex toy. Sure, he was only joking, but I'm willing to bet that there's a huge untapped market for vibrators that also quote great English literature. I think the world will be a much better place once your average Pearl Rabbit can also reel off a few lines from Romeo and Juliet... In any case, the Scarlet website is much more exciting than it used to be and offers some nice free stuff and a blog from the editor. You go, girls. Posted: Monday 5th December 2005, 1:23 AM Puzzy Power, Innocent Pictures and Dogme Porn for WomenThe most famous example of this kind of film is Dogville, starring Nicole Kidman. I was fascinated to discover that there's a whole aspect of the dogme movement that is making porn. What's more, they're creating porn for women, and they've been doing it for quite a few years now. In 1998 the Zentropa filmmakers created the Puzzy Power Manifesto. This statement of aims basically asserts that "Women like watching erotic or pornographic films if the presentation turns them on rather than off." It aims to create films with plot, sensual eroticism, a visual style that encompasses human beauty, humor and an emphasis on the context of sex. Puzzy Power, and their production arm Innocent Pictures have released a number of films for women so far, including Constance, Pink Prison and, this month, All About Anna. This last film is a full feature movie that "just happens" to include explicit sex. It's not widely available so I may have an uphill battle getting hold of it for review, but I'd like to see what they've done with it. The trailer is tantalizingly fabulous... the actors are good looking, and the sex looks very nice. It seems to be in English, although it's set in Denmark and France. Once again, I'm pleased to discover another film to add to my growing collection of porn movies made for women. This selection of titles is still small, but every time I look it's expanding, and that's encouraging. Posted: Thursday 1st December 2005, 6:29 PM Dr Who, Daleks, Sex and PornYep, the Terry Nation estate and the BBC don't take kindly to seeing their evil creations chasing around naked "disco girls" and sexually molesting them with their plungers. The story gave me what could well be the quote of the year, from the director of the Terry Nation estate: "The reason the Daleks are still the most sinister thing in the universe is because they do not make things like porn." Sums it up, really. I should say, I'm a Doctor Who fan from way back, and fondly recall having to build cubby houses in order to safely watch the really scary Tom Baker episodes. Actually, having watched the old series again, I will say that Tom Baker was quite the hornbag as Doctor Who. Yes, I know. Brad Pitt he aint, but he had a very sexy way about him. Especially when Leela, the scantily-clad savage was his companion. The new series with Christopher Eccleston was fab, and I loved the element of sexual tension that was introduced between the Doctor and Rose. And then when the bisexual Captain Jack was introduced, the whole thing became positively erotic. I wouldn't be surprised if the huge interior space of the TARDIS has a bondage room in their somewhere. I think it's safe to say, however, that the Terry Nation guy is right. The Daleks do not belong in any Doctor Who-based sexual fantasy. I mean, their plungers don't vibrate, for a start... Posted: Monday 28th November 2005, 5:50 PM Women less distracted by racy billboardsThis statistic has me asking a few questions drawing a few conclusions. And no, I don't think it's because "women are less visual" thank you very much. Firstly... how often is it that women actually get the chance to be distracted by half-naked men on billboards? Probably not nearly as often as men, I think. I think it's fair to say that the majority of sexed-up advertising is directed at male customers. So the opportunity for female distraction is lower. Secondly... I'm wondering if the half-naked men we're seeing are somehow not making the grade. Maybe they're just not naked enough. Frankly I want to see a maximum distractability rating in my billboards in the future, if you don't mind. I mean, take this fine example: 
According to Adland this billboard was removed because it was "offensive" and "harmful to children". But not because it was distracting. I don't know about you, but I'd certainly be veering when confronted with that. What is the point of this blog entry? I seem to have got off the topic. I think it just gives me an excuse to look at hot guys on billboards. Thankfully I've found this page by a gender studies educator. Sure, it's all very intellectual, but there's a nice collection of distracting male ads there. As I suspected, there's far more ads featuring women than men. This one isn't a billboard, but it sure makes me want to play scrabble:  I'm veering! I'm veering! Posted: Tuesday 22nd November 2005, 11:35 PM Thanks CliteratiThe Cliterati website has been online since 2001. They have great user-submitted erotic fiction and reviews, and they've always encouraged women-friendly erotica. The owner Emily Dubberly also edits Scarlet Magazine which was launched last year and - judging by its website - is still going strong. Nice to see a hard copy women's erotica magazine holding its own in the publishing world. In any case, Cliterati is a great site and I recommend it. Posted: Friday 18th November 2005, 12:22 AM All About Cake PartiesTurns out that this is not entirely the case. CAKE parties, in fact, are "erotic entertainment for women" evenings at which all sorts of naughty things occur. Yes, women strip... but so do the men. In fact, I did some researh into the whole CAKE movement and found myself feeling embarrassed again. Here is another set of women who are working hard to create female-friendly erotic entertainment, and I was completely unaware of them. Dammit. CAKE has been happening in New York for five years (I'm Australian, so I guess it's not surprising I've never heard of them). The parties are big social events for women (and any men they deign to bring) with the focus on "exploring female sexuality." So Cake parties regularly feature male strippers, burlesque-type cabaret shows, bondage evenings, gambling and cocktails. In fact, it seems to be an "anything goes" kind of sex club for women. Which is cool because men have been hogging the "sex club" scene for a long time. It's nice to know there's a place for chicks to enjoy themselves and to be in charge of the action. The CakeNYC website has a fabulous mission statement and philosophy on it that I thoroughly endorse: Women like to initiate sex We get turned on every day of the week We are visual We fantasize We know how to get ourselves off We like sex We know how are bodies work Sex isn’t over until we orgasm Giddy up. I joined the website, but haven't forked over the US$100 to become a member. I mean, why bother, I'm 12,000 miles away (and, judging from the photos of their latest event, far too unfashionable for such a party anyway). The site has terrible navigation, and has only just got on its feet, but I'm sure it will improve. What is good, however, is the open letter to the feminist community in reply to the assertions of "Female Chauvinist Pigs" among others. I just have to quote these two paragraphs, because I think they're well worth repeating: "Some feminists still believe that public displays of sexuality are male designed and any woman who wants to be recognized as sexual in public is an unfortunate, unwitting pawn in an evil and ever-growing male fantasy. Some say we are playing into a "false consciousness" - meaning that we cannot trust our own judgments or choices. "We believe that this philosophy flattens female sexual culture just as insipidly as a Playboy centerfold spread. In a recent New York Times book review, Jennifer Egan asks 'Why do women persist in watching themselves through male eyes? Our answer? We don't! Instead of assuming that men define all women's actions, let's look at the ways women are choosing to be sexual on their own terms." Well said, CAKE ladies! And go to it, I say! Posted: Thursday 17th November 2005, 11:54 PM Fucking Machines for womenThe site is ostensibly aimed at men, but you know, I find the whole thing absolutely fascinating... and very arousing. It's one of the few porn sites that gets through to my jaded senses, weary though I am of most explicit content. What's the appeal of this site? For men, it's the opportunity to see hardcore sex without all those annoying male butts getting in the way. Rest assured, there's no chance of "catching the gay" with this site, because the only man anywhere is a technician in very daggy shorts. But what is the appeal to women? I'm sure there are plenty of female surfers getting off on this stuff - the tour features this quote: "I orgasmed four times watching this. I had no idea when my husband told me about the site what it would be like..." Perhaps the site offers the realisation of a fantasy where you are pleasured by a machine, one that doesn't get tired or fall asleep afterwards. There's an element of helplessness with the idea of being penetrated by a machine, and the implication that you will have no control over your response... that the orgasms will be automatic and intense. I do know that Fucking Machines appeals to me because it dispenses with a lot of the usual nasty porn crap. The makers of this site are genuinely interested in seeing the girls have an orgasm - and there's plenty of Hitachi Magic Wands in use to ensure this happens. There's also a lot of respect for their models - they're never referred to as "sluts" or "whores" and their personalities seem to come through as well. It's not a "porn for women" site according to my highly debatable (and oft disputed) definition of the term, but I'll definitely give it honorary status. Indeed, if more porn sites were as hot and inclusive as this, we wouldn't need "porn for women" at all. The update page has heaps of sample pics - warning, it's very explicit. Posted: Friday 11th November 2005, 9:11 PM Erotic Museums DirectoryI also took photos and wrote up an article which was this month's feature at For The Girls. While doing research for that article I discovered that there's actually a heap of erotic museums around the world. Most of them are in Europe, but a new one has just opened in Miami in the US. So I decided to gather together all the information I could about erotic museums and whack them on one site. The result is Erotic Museums. I didn't realise that collecting erotic antiques was such an obsession for some people. I'm almost curious to take it up myself. The thing is that most antique shops will not put erotic artifacts on display so you have to quietly ask if they have any behind the counter or out the back. I loved the story of Miss Naomi, who runs the new museum in Miami. She toured the antique boutiques of Europe with a sign around her neck that read "Buying Erotica". Like you do. I hope to expand my Erotic Museums site as more such spaces open. I may also include art galleries. All that research made me look further into a fascinating porn niche as well - Vintage Erotica. I found a fab site that's been open since 1997 - Retro Raunch This site has heaps of lovely old photos and it's got that "nice" feel about it. There's plenty of respect for the material, and the surfer, at Retro Raunch. I think women would enjoy it as much as men. If you want to know what's on offer, I made up a gallery of sample pics here: Retro Raunch Vintage Hardcore Gallery Posted: Tuesday 8th November 2005, 7:33 PM Anna Span to produce porn for women movieI'm pleased to hear that Anna has embarked on a new film especially for women called "Women Love Porn" and it's going to feature ten different female directors. Anna has previously released five erotic films aimed mainly at women. Most do not feature excessive genital close-ups and offer a lot more storyline than mainstream porn films. While they’re widely available in the UK, primarily through the Ann Summers stores, it seems her films are a little harder to find elsewhere. Hopefully this will change soon. Anna studied film at St Martin’s School of art, and her final dissertation was titled "Towards a New Pornography." She argued that porn for women was one of the "last underdeveloped areas left in film." "I use good-looking men and have the camera pointed on the blokes as well as the women," she told Handbag. "And my titles never slag off women - even if the females are sometimes submissive." Anna has had several documentaries made about her work and she’s also written a book called Erotic Home Video which is a guide to making your own smutty movies at home. Given that Anna has been so successful and prolific in the UK, I’m almost embarrassed that I hadn’t heard of her before now. I’m now going to try and get hold of some of her existing films to review them for FTG. It’s good to know there’s another woman out there working hard to make decent porn. Posted: Saturday 29th October 2005, 1:18 AM Stella Films releases City of Flesh 6This one's called Lisa's Little Secret, and it contains one storyline spread across seven scenes. Estelle elaborated on the film to AVN: "I think it’s going to start a debate over whether men would have sex offered to them and turn it away, whether a woman having sex with another woman is really sex, and whether Lisa really had sex because she didn’t actively participate," Estelle also gave an interview to Adult News Online. I like what she had to say about what's wrong with traditional porn: "In traditional adult movies, women are portrayed mostly for men’s gratification. And they’re called names. You’ll never see a movie where women are degrading men. Traditional porn movies are designed to make men feel good, not women." Keep up the good work Estelle! The City of Flesh films are available for download at Ms Naughty's AEBN Theatre. Posted: Saturday 29th October 2005, 12:45 AM Can we redefine "Female Chauvinist Pigs" please?This book condemns the rise of "raunch culture" and the predilection for many young women to flaunt their bodies, view porn and have meaningless casual sex. The author takes issue with the idea that such flagrantly "male" behaviour has been dressed up as female power. I could discuss the pros and cons of her argument at length, but I really shouldn’t because I’ve not yet read the book, only various articles on it. I can, however, make a comment about the title. What I’m not happy about is the way she’s screwed up what "female chauvinist pig" should mean, particularly when it comes to porn. In Levy’s book, the alleged FCMs betray the sisterhood by going to strip clubs and CAKE parties to see other women strip, and by viewing porn featuring naked women. In her view, FCMs have taken up "objectifying" other women. I want to put my hand up and say: what about me? How come I don’t get to qualify as a Female Chauvinist Pig? I’m one of those evil women who’s making a living from porn, but the difference is that I’m "objectifying"* men. I help other women to admire the male form and encourage them to see men in a purely sexual light. I’m part of the "raunch culture" because I’m trying to bring overt female sexuality into the open, through my encouragement of porn for women. And surely I’m an FCM because I enjoy hardcore porn that features women having sex with men, one of the FCM activities described in the book? And what about the time I tried pole dancing for exercise, although God knows it nearly killed me? And how about all those chicks who love CFNM parties - private gatherings where men take off their clothes for the pleasure of women. Or the giggling women at male strip shows screaming "show us your dick!" Don’t they get to be maligned as well? Should I even ask whether gay porn viewers are male chauvinist pigs because they like "objectifying" other men, or are they gay chauvinist pigs, a whole other category? That’s the thing I don’t understand. Levy has slotted herself into the old argument that all porn is about naked women, and that it’s all about degradation and objectifying the female form. Therefore a woman who enjoys porn must somehow be oppressing other women in some way. Given the multi-faceted nature of modern pornography, it doesn’t make sense, but the view persists. Levy isn’t the first to get confused like this. A couple of years ago the Nielsen Netratings survey revealed that 28% of all porn surfers were women. When reporting this, the mainstream media consistently referred to Suicide Girls as a "women’s porn site." I could never work it out. That site predominantly features nude women. Yes, the ethic behind it is supposedly different to most mainstream sites, but on the simple level of content, it caters to heterosexual men #. Why don’t people acknowledge that if a woman is looking at porn, she might be looking at nude men? This "blind spot" persists because there’s a cultural fiction that a heterosexual naked man is not worth looking at. People insist that women are more beautiful than men, and that penises are ugly. Therefore, no normal woman would want to voluntarily seek out an image of a nude man. Only gays do that. I would have liked to see Levy’s argument applied to my kind of porn for women. Are we letting the team down by looking at naked men? Is it OK to "objectify" a man but not a woman? Is there something inherently bad about enjoying porn, even if it’s presented in a respectful manner? I’d always pictured a female chauvinist pig as a woman who is insensitive and boorish, only there’s a reversal of the sexes. So an FCM would ogle men with impunity, whistle at them as they walked past and make derogatory comments about the size of a man’s penis. Maybe after sex she’d tell him to get back in the garage where he belonged. Interestingly, dictionary.com defines a chauvinist as "a person with a prejudiced belief in the superiority of his or her own kind," which means that the word itself should probably not have been used in Levy’s context at all. It seems as though there’s a whole lot of unquestioned assumptions being made about what women are thinking (or not thinking) when they step beyond the assigned role of meek virgin and start to wield their sexuality, be it through the use of porn or through the display of their bodies. And when you start making generalisations about people’s motivations, things get tricky. When a woman goes to one of my sites to look at pictures of naked men does it matter if she simply sees a fantasy object? Is she viewing porn with an ironic slant or a purely lustful one? More importantly, does that affect the way she treats the men in her life? Does it make her less respectful of men, or does she go away with a deeper sense of the beauty of the male body? Does it make her want sex without love or does it mean she goes back to her partner with increased desire for better, more meaningful sex? I have no idea. I can’t pretend to know what other women think. But it seems that Levy does, and labels them accordingly. The best response to Levy’s book that I’ve read so far is by Kara Jesella at Alternet via Nerve. Well worth a read. * Note: I’m not a Dworkinite, and don’t subscribe to that old argument about porn’s "objectification" and how it leads to rape. I objectify the shop assistant at the supermarket as merely a means to an end, so let’s not get into this argument here. # Note: Yes yes, don’t get your knickers in a knot, O lesbians and girls of fluid sexuality. I know, I know. Just let me make my point. Posted: Friday 28th October 2005, 11:16 PM Online sex games now aimed at womenGaming has many similarities with porn when it comes to female users. The vast majority of games are made for men and boys. It's considered to be a male pastime. "Most games perpetuate the stereotype that men are visual and women aren't," says Wired, "so women must not be interested in adventure games, although they might kick ass at online scrabble. Yet 43 percent of gamers are women, according to the Entertainment Software Association, and they're not all out there spelling Q-words on the pink box." Suddenly the industry sees dollar signs in the shape of ignored female gamers, and it's scrambling to catch up. The article quotes Brenda Brathwaite, a game industry spokeswoman who has been working on creating games that women will actually like. She is focusing on games that involve personal interaction and relationships, and that allow gamers to meet up and have cybersex. A game space or situation is considered to be safer than the average chat room. "So far, the comments have all been positive," she says. "But on every panel I've been on about sex in games, there's an undercurrent of 'but how will we protect the women?' Like women wouldn't want to see it, or it's not okay for women. As if women don't have phenomenal sex drives on their own." I've never been big on games. I just don't have time, and my RSI doesn't much like pressing the space bar six thousand times to shoot up some imaginary enemy. But I do know that there are plenty of chicks who love gaming, and I'm glad to see the industry making an effort to cater to them. Here's hoping there's some hot virtual guys in the graphics as well. It's about time women enjoyed the male equivalent of Lara Croft's boobs. Posted: Friday 28th October 2005, 7:39 PM Harris Poll reveals US women critical of pornThe internet survey of 2,555 people asked what effect porn had on men and children, and what people thought the government should do about it. 62% of women said they thought porn raised men's expectations about how women should look, and more women than men believe that porn harms relationships - perhaps because it changes the way men expect women to look and behave. Almost half of all respondents said they thought porn was demeaning to women, but this view was held more widely by women (57%). Very few people surveyed were in favour of censorship by the government, although 53% of women wanted some kind of regulation of porn. What does this survey say about women and porn? Nothing new, I think. It's not really surprising that everyday women feel the bleached, waxed, silicon-enhanced and starved female stars are distorting men's view of normal female beauty. If women are feeling undermined by the ideals of "beauty" held up by Californian porn, no wonder they think relationships are threatened by it. What I find interesting is that this survey reveals that women are more concerned about the negative aesthetic and immature, "bad sex" nature of mainstream porn, than they are about "morals". They're not saying that sex in itself is bad, or that porn equals rape, or that the women involved are exploited, or any of the Dworkinesque tripe that is usually attributed to women who aren't keen on porn. Yes, a majority thought porn is demeaning to women, but you know what? A lot of porn IS demeaning to women. Your average "reality" site is based on the idea of putting women down. So I think this view is not surprising either. From a business sense I don't find this survey discouraging because it just reinforces my view that a lot of women aren't keen on most mainstream porn that is made for men. Take away the unrealistic body images, the misogynist viewpoint, and the bad sex, and I think everyday women will be more keen on adult material. Posted: Tuesday 25th October 2005, 6:56 AM |
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